Lately I've been having these dreams about someone I don't want to think of, let alone dream about. The theme around the dream is almost always the same, I want to know why. These dreams shouldn't bother me, but they do, I wake up feeling as if I have been taken back to a place I never wanted to see again. I feel angry, sad, lonely, guilty, ashamed, and resentful. No good can come out of having this person in my dream. The worst part is that the dreams have really come out of nowhere and are starting to increase in frequency; it truly makes me anxious. So I ask, how does someone escape their dreama? How do I avoid this one?
Friday, February 24, 2012
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Post mashup
Allow me now to be absolved from all past posts I have promised to write but have yet to find the time/motivation to post.
Second half of 2011 (July to Dec)
After writing the post about the first half of the year, I wrote about my best British friend, Lee. I was rather sad to see him go but it was the very next night that I met a rather lovely man ho has since then stolen my heart. Him and I spent the entire month of July together, and that time remains some of the happiest I have known. After he left I started reevaluating my direction in life, and although always a psychologist, I decided that I wanted to teach, which had always been an ambition of me and began to set that plan in motion. It was a few weeks after that, that I decided instead of staying here and teaching I wanted to go abroad and teach English, as this would not only allow me to help others, it would allow me to travel. In November I cross off an item off my bucket list by cooking an entire Thanksgiving meal from scratch! December was spent dreading my birthday as I thought 25 was the end of the world, where I would automatically start sprouting a few grey strands and the wrinkles on my face were going to start making their stay permanent. I am please to inform you that this has not been the case. I can honestly say that 2011 has been my favorite year to date, and I am pleased to have finally successfully completed a New Years resolution I set.
A Beatles playlist for 2011
January - Eleanor Rigby
February - Don't Let Me Down
March - Get Back
April - Here Comes the Sun
May - Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da
June - Strawberry Fields
July - Good Day Sunshine
August - All My Loving
September - Help
October - Revolution
November - Across the Universe
December - Birthday
Christmas is going to the dogs
This year for Christmas I got the absolute best present, a puppy! He's was a six week old yellow lab, and he was the absolute cutest little guy ever! Now he is a three month of chewing machine, but none the less I love him all the same. I never thought I'd love a dog so much, but Cooper (official name Admiral John Herrington Cooper) has melted my heart!He's so smart too, and I've already taught him how to sit, lie down, shake hands, stay, and play fetch. I absolutely love my little guy, who I fear when he is fully grown will be the size of a horse.
Second half of 2011 (July to Dec)
After writing the post about the first half of the year, I wrote about my best British friend, Lee. I was rather sad to see him go but it was the very next night that I met a rather lovely man ho has since then stolen my heart. Him and I spent the entire month of July together, and that time remains some of the happiest I have known. After he left I started reevaluating my direction in life, and although always a psychologist, I decided that I wanted to teach, which had always been an ambition of me and began to set that plan in motion. It was a few weeks after that, that I decided instead of staying here and teaching I wanted to go abroad and teach English, as this would not only allow me to help others, it would allow me to travel. In November I cross off an item off my bucket list by cooking an entire Thanksgiving meal from scratch! December was spent dreading my birthday as I thought 25 was the end of the world, where I would automatically start sprouting a few grey strands and the wrinkles on my face were going to start making their stay permanent. I am please to inform you that this has not been the case. I can honestly say that 2011 has been my favorite year to date, and I am pleased to have finally successfully completed a New Years resolution I set.
A Beatles playlist for 2011
January - Eleanor Rigby
February - Don't Let Me Down
March - Get Back
April - Here Comes the Sun
May - Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da
June - Strawberry Fields
July - Good Day Sunshine
August - All My Loving
September - Help
October - Revolution
November - Across the Universe
December - Birthday
Christmas is going to the dogs
This year for Christmas I got the absolute best present, a puppy! He's was a six week old yellow lab, and he was the absolute cutest little guy ever! Now he is a three month of chewing machine, but none the less I love him all the same. I never thought I'd love a dog so much, but Cooper (official name Admiral John Herrington Cooper) has melted my heart!He's so smart too, and I've already taught him how to sit, lie down, shake hands, stay, and play fetch. I absolutely love my little guy, who I fear when he is fully grown will be the size of a horse.
New Year, same resolution
So like last year, since I was so successful in my resolution, I have decided to let it roll into 2012. I am determined to make 2012 my best year yet! Already this early into the new year, I know that this year is going to be HUGE and so much better than last year. I think it really is going to be a turning point in my life, a whole new book. I think it is very fitting that my 25th year should be a time for new adventures and reinvention. I'm genuinely excited. Here's to the next quarter of a century :)
Monday, February 20, 2012
Forgive me, as what I am about to write I don't expect to make sense. Perhaps it will appear as if I suffer from Wenecke's aphasia or I am trying to be poetic and lyrical like Lewis Carroll in Alice in Wonderland or Noam Chomsky....I am not but perhaps in time my rose tinted glasses will allow me to see the greens of the world a little brighter.
My mind s not entirely my own today, and I cant help but feel like I will not be content until I get this all out. A notebook and pencil are not my allies today and neither are my thoughts.
I'm watching a "Bag of Bones" right now which is an adaptation of a Stephen King book...I'd like to write someday. I wold love to write a book but what kind of book I do not know, I thought a children's book would be easiest....nothing so simple actually.
Pencil block. I wish I could paint. I wonder how I would look as a blonde? I wish my memory was worse. Leopard socks in downtown rain. Why do the British say chips and we say French fries, I know they hate the French, but why did we decide to call them such. What year were they invented? There was that whole ridiculous movement about changing the name to freedom fries. Does art imitate life or does life imitate art, sometimes I feel like I try to fit my life into things I see, rather than see things that fit into my life. If I were to act in a horror movie, I think I'd be genuinely scared. I've never really had a nickname outside my family but at 24 a few people started calling me Ky and a few others Dorothy...odd huh? Fishing fishy fish.
My mind s not entirely my own today, and I cant help but feel like I will not be content until I get this all out. A notebook and pencil are not my allies today and neither are my thoughts.
I'm watching a "Bag of Bones" right now which is an adaptation of a Stephen King book...I'd like to write someday. I wold love to write a book but what kind of book I do not know, I thought a children's book would be easiest....nothing so simple actually.
Pencil block. I wish I could paint. I wonder how I would look as a blonde? I wish my memory was worse. Leopard socks in downtown rain. Why do the British say chips and we say French fries, I know they hate the French, but why did we decide to call them such. What year were they invented? There was that whole ridiculous movement about changing the name to freedom fries. Does art imitate life or does life imitate art, sometimes I feel like I try to fit my life into things I see, rather than see things that fit into my life. If I were to act in a horror movie, I think I'd be genuinely scared. I've never really had a nickname outside my family but at 24 a few people started calling me Ky and a few others Dorothy...odd huh? Fishing fishy fish.
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